Portrait

Portrait of Me as a Media User

Of course, it is impossible for me to pigeonhole myself with a quantitative or even mostly objective qualitative analysis of my media usage, simply due to my closeness with the subject at hand. However, a fair bit of introspection has revealed that my electronic life is filled with mostly paradoxes and antitheses. This is best characterized by my relationship with my cell phone. As with most people, I have an intrinsic appreciation of the sleek and the new. The cell phone is the epitome of this exultation: so tiny, yet so versatile. I love to carry around, to play games, to take photos, despite the puzzling fact that I loathe to talk on it. For me, something fundamental is lost when one converses on the phone or types out a text message. We lose a metaphysical aspect of our interpersonal relations through abbreviation; the intangible connection to the person which we undergo when we interact face-to-face is destroyed by the synthesized, processed sound of their voice in the receiver. I love to wear my cell phone because of the versatility and ubiquity it represents, but hate that the price we pay for such a tiny, versatile tool is a fundamental part of the collective human experience.

Quite the opposite can be said of my relationship with the computer. The facets of a persona forged through blogs,¹ MySpace,² and Facebook³ sometimes bring you closer to an individual than a face-to-face meeting ever could, and countless other sources bring a whirlwind of information whose sheer volume is overwhelming. When I log on, I am reminded of the reflection of the sun in a clear pool of water. As I dive in, trying to grab one of the ethereal dancing lights, a hundred others surround me, shifting and changing as if to remind me that they could form and hold more patterns than I could ever comprehend in a thousand lifetimes. I sometimes dream of what it would be like to know all there is to know, but every Google⁴ search shows me the futility of such idle fantasies. And yet, I do not hate the computer as I hate the cell phone, for it allows me the chance to experience millions of different voices and opinions at the touch of a button, creating globalization at a scale never before accomplished.

Music and film form the last, and perhaps most vital, part of my digital world. If I were merely subject to my tortured relationships with the computer and cell phone, then insanity would have overtaken me long ago. Music and film are my reprieve from the pressures of social digital existence. I watch and listen merely to enjoy. From dashing special effects to poignant love stories, upbeat techno to pensive emotional punk, mass media inspires and sustains me

In a way, the digital world is comprised of both the ultimate balance and paradox. We created information sharing devices to satiate our natural curiosity to learn more, a continual process and an impossible goal. However, the same devices which may have brought us to the brink of madness and beyond also created untold opportunity for us to disseminate our opinions and artwork as never before, keeping us sane through the conundrum of our daily existence and ultimate purpose.

¹A website on which people post thoughts on daily events and their personal lives

²A social network on which individuals can browse for information about others in a virtually unrestricted manner

³A social network which is more restricted than MySpace, allowing only those which people which an individual “friends” to see his or her personal information

⁴A search engine which currently dominates the market of web searches